I love the Bible! The stories are so rich and colorful. People that don’t read it, don’t really understand what a great sense of humor God has. Sometimes, I catch His ironic humor right away, and sometimes I catch it in a story that I have read a hundred times.
This is one of those times. I have read the story in Genesis 17 many times, but today, I caught the humor. I want to give you my translation of this story….
You want me to what???
This is very possibly Abrahams 99th birthday when this transpires because it starts out this way…
1And when Abram was ninety years old and nine, the Lord appeared to Abram, and said unto him, I am the Almighty God; walk before me, and be thou perfect.2And I will make my covenant between me and thee, and will multiply thee exceedingly.
So it appears to be his 99th birthday, and he gets the most awesome present…God appears to him, and promises him more children. I know at this point you are thinking, “that doesn’t sound like a very good birthday present when you are 99 years old”. Trust me, in biblical times, this was a great present! So, in my mind, the conversation goes something like this…
GOD: Happy 99th Birthday Abram! Have I got a birthday surprise for you! I have decided to change your name for your birthday.
ABRAM: Change my name? What are you going to change my name to?
GOD: Abraham. It means “The Father of Many Nations”. Isn’t that awesome?
ABRAHAM: (name change noted) Well, ummm… yes. I guess it sounds good. But, you do realize I only have 1 child right?
GOD: Of course I do silly. I AM God… remember?! So, here is the rest of your birthday present Abraham…. I am going to make you verrrrry fruitful. Lots and lots of kids. And some of them will even be kings!
ABRAHAM: Really?!? That is awesome God! But I also feel the need to remind you again…. I am 99! And did you see Sarah? She ain’t no spring chicken either! We are pretty old. Let’s just stick with Ishmael. How does that sound? He is a great kid!
GOD: Yes, Abraham, Ishmael is a great kid. He will be blessed also. But this is that promise I made to you a long time ago. Remember back in Genesis 12? And being God, I always keep my promises. But…. there is one thing.
ABRAHAM: That sounds a bit ominous. What is it?
GOD: Circumcision.
ABRAHAM: Ummmm….. what is that?
GOD: Well…. that means you will have to cut “it”.
ABRAHAM: Cut it? Cut what?
GOD: “IT”!
ABRAHAM: It? “IT” it????? (At this point I imagine Abraham wondering if God is just teasing, and as the realization sets in that God is not joking, his look turns to wide eyed fear). I can’t cut “it”! I will need “it” to be fruitful and stuff. If I cut “it”, “it” may not work anymore!
GOD: Trust me….”it” will still work. Oh, and every single man in the camp has to cut “it” too.
ABRAHAM: Every single man? Oh…. they are NOT going to like that!
I imagine at this point, Abraham is thinking that the men in the camp might stone him when he tells them this. Being the visual person that I am, I see this playing out something like this…. Abraham calls all the men in the camp together. They think it is to celebrate his birthday. They are excited and looking forward to a party and some cake and stuff. As they stand there looking at the birthday boy, he relays God’s message to them. I can imagine them looking at one another quizzically, (you know that look a dog gets when he turns his head to the side and his ears come forward?) and attempt to grasp what Abraham just told them. What is crazier to me is that THEY DO IT! That is every bit as miraculous as water coming out of a rock. Just sayin…..
How can you not love a story like that? Circumcision has always seemed like such a strange way for God to make a covenant with man. But God always gets to the heart of the matter. What is the most important thing to you? We all know that “it” is very important to every man. And while “it” is very important to man, the new covenant required that God give up what was most important to Him and that was His son, Jesus Christ. In light of that, the covenant of circumcision doesn’t seem quite as bad. Whatever God may ask you to give up, rest assured that He is willing to give up far more. And His reward for our faithfulness will be much greater than our sacrifice.
I titled this My Awesome Ridiculous God because there are so many times with God that what He asks us to do is literally contrary to, well, ummm…. common sense. God instructs us to give so that we will have more. So, let me see if I understand this God. Basically 2 – 1 = 4? Would that be right? Yes it would, but only in the parallel reality that involves God.
In John chapter 9, when Jesus heals a blind man he uses spit and dirt. How could that possibly work? It works because Genesis 2:7 says that God formed man from the dust of the earth. Only God can fix blindness with mud because only God could make a man out of mud.
So next time you are thinking that God is telling you to do something, and it seems ridiculous, then go ahead and do it. Because that is just how He rolls!
When I hush...He speaks 